My Girlfriend

[Batik]

Lol. I know what you mean. At my school people will see my last name for the first time and they will stare at it blankly and then have a shot at it. After butchering my name they give up and just ask what it is. Funny stuff to watch though. :p .

[Ka-Talliya]

My Maiden name was Davis...Schultz is such a better last name!!
It's kind of funny, most people assume I'm German...and I'm really not.

I wouldn't want my husband to take my last name, I like that tradition.

[Andromeda18_]

Andromeda - Would you really want your husband to take your last name... I would only do it if my last name was something like smith or gaylord...

I wouldn't want him to take my last name the same way I wouldn't want to take his. Still, it's a matter of equal rights. Why is it weird for a man to take his wife's last name but it's normal for a woman to take her husband's last name? It's the exact same thing!

[Nina182B]

I'm like you Zagatto, I believe in just living together as well. I mean, if you're a religious person then marrying makes sense because a religious ceremony will be performed and you'll be married with God's blessing. However, if you're not a religious person what's the difference between being married and just living together? Some signature's on a piece of paper?

If I were to list the top reason of why I'd want to get married (besides loving my future husband) it would have to be more for social reasons. I want to invite all of my friends and family to witness the ceremony and have the party afterwards. I want the ring on my finger and to be able to sign my name Nina Cyrek (I think it's a cool last name- my boyfriend is Polish) If I were to never get married, I would feel like I didn't really live out my life. It is after all one of the most memorable events a person can go through. I understand why you're asking those questions Andromeda. I've never really thought about the "why's" before, just always felt that I will get married eventually in life. I don't really see a big difference between a couple that's living together and a couple that's married.. by difference, I mean as in one couple being happier than the other.

My parents are also very old fashioned filipino parents.. when I moved out to live with my boyfriend, they were very sad but did not stop me, because they knew I grew up in the US and that I would be happy moving (unlike the Philippines, where the majority marry and need the parent's consent to do so) In fact, my parents tell people that I have married my boyfriend because that is the only way they can describe it to their filipino friends. It's kinda weird, but I understand.

[Japschin]

Contrary to you Nina, I would rather have a quiet and small wedding when I marry. Too big of a crowd is a nuisance at times. Too much trouble.

I am for living together. You don't have papers to tie you to a person therefore when you are ready to get out of the r/s, you could do it anytime when you think appropriate.

[Andromeda18_]

If I were to list the top reason of why I'd want to get married (besides loving my future husband) it would have to be more for social reasons. I want to invite all of my friends and family to witness the ceremony and have the party afterwards. I want the ring on my finger and to be able to sign my name Nina Cyrek (I think it's a cool last name- my boyfriend is Polish) If I were to never get married, I would feel like I didn't really live out my life. It is after all one of the most memorable events a person can go through. I understand why you're asking those questions Andromeda. I've never really thought about the "why's" before, just always felt that I will get married eventually in life. I don't really see a big difference between a couple that's living together and a couple that's married.. by difference, I mean as in one couple being happier than the other.

My parents are also very old fashioned filipino parents.. when I moved out to live with my boyfriend, they were very sad but did not stop me, because they knew I grew up in the US and that I would be happy moving (unlike the Philippines, where the majority marry and need the parent's consent to do so) In fact, my parents tell people that I have married my boyfriend because that is the only way they can describe it to their filipino friends. It's kinda weird, but I understand.

I guess people are just different and want different things. I don't need and don't want any party or ring. I believe in love and need only love. That's enough for me.
I was watching a show on tv the other day and a psychiatrist was saying that marriage is the most important thing to a woman. Not just being married but having a perfect marriage. And when things don't work as expected they get sick on account of that, physically sick! On the other hand, for a man being married is good enough. They don't care about it the same way women do, they don't get sick like women do because it's not the most important thing in their life. I suppose that in this case I'm more like a man than like a woman. All I need is to be with the person I love.

[Nina182B]

I can believe that psychiatrist.. most woman do strive for the perfect marriage, which doesn't exist. No relationship is perfect.

[Andromeda18_]

The psychiatrist didn't come up with those things himself. American scientists conducted a study that lasted for 15 years and those were the results. They also found out that women don't forget! They did a simple experience where they asked women to think about an argument they had had with their husbands while checking their blood pressure and what happened was that their blood pressure increased immediately as soon as they started thinking about that argument. When they tried the same thing with men their blood pressure stayed the same.
I personally believe these things are real! I see women everyday whining because they had an argument with their husbands or because their husbands aren't romantic anymore, etc, etc. Men really don't care about these things so much, they have other things to think about.

[Nina182B]

I believe all that too. That bit you mentioned about their other half not being romantic anymore is so true! That is one of the main complaints I hear from my girlfriends. I think that will happen once in a while in all relationships.. it's up to both people to make the effort and keep things interesting.

[morgorath]

I believe all that too. That bit you mentioned about their other half not being romantic anymore is so true! That is one of the main complaints I hear from my girlfriends. I think that will happen once in a while in all relationships.. it's up to both people to make the effort and keep things interesting.

Well I leave with Akane for a weekend trip to South DAkota to see "Rodney Carrington" and come back and bam look what the thread has turned into. Akane is going to love this new topic. For me I personally believe that a wedding is like a show or party. I want to drink and be marry at the reception so that means I am having a pre-party or as Akane calls it a ceremony. She is cathloic so you can bet your bottom dollar that her family wants a nice big wedding (she is also the oldest and her other sister is leaving the church in a way, so she might be the only one her dad walks down the isle) Rodney says, "I dont carry about the wedding, just make sure they have beer and whiskey when the whole things over."

I am not saying I want the same thing, but I want to have a huge blast. Getting married is the biggest step I have left to take. I was there for the Schultz wedding even danced with the yougest member of that family. I could be happy with the way they had thier wedding or with a big Hoe Down either way. As long as it isn't a drive thru wedding in Vegas...

[Nina182B]

For me I personally believe that a wedding is like a show or party. I want to drink and be marry at the reception so that means I am having a pre-party or as Akane calls it a ceremony.

Hell yeah!!! I want the ceremony to be short and sweet, and have a long party.

[Akane]

Well holy crap this thread just went off on a tangent about marriages..... yes my sis might be thinking about leaving the church but I have no real desire to leave the church and I have always dreamed of that wedding with the beautiful white gown and all the trimmings so I hope I get that wedding but it might not happen...but I have always told myself that I would live with the person that I loved before I married them.... I have always believed in it..... anyways that is the one thing against my religion... and I see parents cringing a the fact that I live with Morg. well just my Mom anyways she is very religious..... My Dad on the other hand he is very much a realist.... so he knew what was happening before I told him... he just knew... Anyways I will talk at you all later..... And Morgy was right I like this convo that everybody is having right now

[Andromeda18_]

While we're on the subject I'd like to ask you what you had to give up when you started living together. You know, things you used to do when you lived alone that you no longer do because you live with someone else.

[Nina182B]

While we're on the subject I'd like to ask you what you had to give up when you started living together. You know, things you used to do when you lived alone that you no longer do because you live with someone else.

I used to go to more parties and clubs. You know, like clubbing with the girlfriends. I still go out with them but I can't get my boyfriend to come along. (Doesn't like crowds or dancing) So sometimes when my friends ask me to go out, I would be more inclined to stay at home because I know my boyfriend is there. Also, I haven't been watching as much anime as I used to My boyfriend and I started watching Fushigi Yuugi together and it is taking way way long to finish because he doesn't want to watch as often as I do. I could watch it on my own but it's not as fun.

[Akane]

Well before Morg I did not live alone for long. I hada boyfriend before him that sorta lived with me and then he cheated on me... the only reason I know he cheated on me was for the fact he took my truck out for the whole night and did not get back till 5 in the morning and then when I got in my truck to go somewhere a girls blouse was sitting in the back seat and a rose was propped up on the dash that was not for me...... HHMMMMMM I think he was cheating anyways then I would go out with my friends alittle bit more when I was not with Morg but not much and now if we go out we go out with our mutula friends which are alot of our old friends just now we both know them... but we still go out to the bars and still do things that I would do on my own..... it is just a little different becuz I always now think of him and now think of things that would include both of us and not jsut me...... it is sometimes still hard but I am working on it...