am i out of line?
#1
I am a 21 year old college student living at home with my mother, 18 year old sister, and her 19 year old boyfriend. I am really sick of this guy, he puts his nose in family buisness, and gets too comferatable in our house (keep in mind this is a 2 bedroom tiny house) He shares a room with my sister, while my mother sleeps in the livingroom. He makes around 1000 a month and has full beniftes where he works...he has been living with us for 5 months now. the reason he moved in in the first place was because he was thrown out of his house (his landlord was a dick, and it wasnt to any fault of his own)

What i want to know, is should this guy move out...he has more then enough money to live by himself...but every tim i bring this up to my mother she asks why its so important that he leaves....i keep reminding her that its important to me because we hav'nt gone more then six months without "taking in a stray"...yes we might as well be a motel 6, then she comes around and call me a "selfish jerk" for wanting him out, and that it would make my sister unhappy...my sister that isnt ready to move out, but is aparently ready for an adult relationship...It might just be me, but i actually think she would preffer him there over me. oh and by the way, my brother is homeless, but my mom wont take him in because she is trying to teach him indepenance...WTF is that, if i have to share my house with anyone, it should be my brother who actually needs a place to stay...

I will be looking for a new place soon, because i cant stand the living conditions here...to me this is one of those things that will make me resent my family for a long while
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#2
That's just fucked up what the hell and yeah he should move out. I don?t understand how you could be called greedy in this situation personally. I will be honest though your mother?s logic in my eyes anyways is pretty fucked up but that?s my view but I can see why it would make you resent your family truly sickening that?s what I really have to say. You didn?t go too far and you are correct to want him out and good luck with moving out hope everything goes well for you.
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#3
I could see her not wanting to throw him out unless he's a complete dick. The part I think is retarded is she won't let your brother back but she will let him stay there even though he has the means to live alone...
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#4
Yeah, it sounds pretty cool of your mom to take him and others in like that. Did she ever let any of your friends stay over?

Is your mom overprotective of your sister? Maybe this is a way to keep her daughter home a little longer.

Anyway, I'm not giving advice on family matters so you'll have to sort this out on your own as far as I'm concerned. Always too complicated for outsiders to make a sensible comment on. Good luck!
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#5
In no offense to you or your mother but your her son f**k this guy. He should damn hell move out. Family comes first, how the hell is forced homelessness going to teach anyone anything?
I stress I mean no offense but to be frank your mother should be asshamed for caring more about your sisters boyfriend than her own son.

I would honestly try to find my own place and room with my brother if I were in your situation, provided you could support yourself.
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#6
I think you should get a girlfriend, have her move in, and then bang her real loud every night. And then if your mom questions you about it, be like 'What, that's what my sister's doing'. Maybe that'll make her think twice.

What? Everyone else already gave him the more reasonable solutions. Figured I'd give him an extreme alternative to choose from.Big Grin
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#7
Vicious Wrote:I think you should get a girlfriend, have her move in, and then bang her real loud every night. And then if your mom questions you about it, be like 'What, that's what my sister's doing'. Maybe that'll make her think twice.

What? Everyone else already gave him the more reasonable solutions. Figured I'd give him an extreme alternative to choose from.Big Grin

I like that solution lol
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#8
I know what that is like, my friends mom is the exact sameway. It has alot to do with the way she was raised. There is nothing you can do really except move out and deal with it.
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#9
odin0425 Wrote:I am a 21 year old college student living at home with my mother, 18 year old sister, and her 19 year old boyfriend. I am really sick of this guy, he puts his nose in family buisness, and gets too comferatable in our house (keep in mind this is a 2 bedroom tiny house) He shares a room with my sister, while my mother sleeps in the livingroom. He makes around 1000 a month and has full beniftes where he works...he has been living with us for 5 months now. the reason he moved in in the first place was because he was thrown out of his house (his landlord was a dick, and it wasnt to any fault of his own)

What i want to know, is should this guy move out...he has more then enough money to live by himself...but every tim i bring this up to my mother she asks why its so important that he leaves....i keep reminding her that its important to me because we hav'nt gone more then six months without "taking in a stray"...yes we might as well be a motel 6, then she comes around and call me a "selfish jerk" for wanting him out, and that it would make my sister unhappy...my sister that isnt ready to move out, but is aparently ready for an adult relationship...It might just be me, but i actually think she would preffer him there over me. oh and by the way, my brother is homeless, but my mom wont take him in because she is trying to teach him indepenance...WTF is that, if i have to share my house with anyone, it should be my brother who actually needs a place to stay...

I will be looking for a new place soon, because i cant stand the living conditions here...to me this is one of those things that will make me resent my family for a long while

Personaly, I don't think you're one bit out of line. If I were in your place I think I would've freaked out a long time ago. I'd probably do something extreme like what Vicious suggested, just to piss them off, then again I have a bit of a temper so...
If there's one thing I like is my privacy and living in a small house with a stranger that keeps poking his nose in other people's business would truly set me off. I mean, I don't like it when people go into my room without asking, I suppose I'm quite territorial.
On the other hand it is nice of your mother to take in someone who was thrown out his house, but not for 5 months!!! And not when he has enough money to live by himself!!! And it really doesn't make any sense that your mother's trying to teach your brother a lesson and then does the exact opposite with some other guy.
If you can afford to move out and help your brother then you should do so.
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#10
Andromeda18_ Wrote:I'd probably do something extreme like what Vicious suggested, just to piss them off, then again I have a bit of a temper so...

Glad we see eye to eye. So if you ever need help with pissing off your mom or whomever with my plan, I'll be glad to help out. :o
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#11
Andromeda18_ Wrote:I mean, I don't like it when people go into my room without asking, I suppose I'm quite territorial.

I'm that way too. I get paranoid for people to be in my room with out me in there, but I have lots of things I don't want some people knowing about.

But moving out is probably best. Once you?re gone it isn't your problem anymore, so it is the best way to just ignore the situation, since I don't really think there is going to be a way to solve it while that kind of logic exists.
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#12
That'd be a piss off...

I have a similar ish problem, cept its family and family. My 28 and 24 year old brothers wont move out, they wont get a job, they wont even do house chores. Its pretty sad. -__-; I bet you I'll be out before them. Which is sad considering I just turned 16.

Its nice of your mom to let him in, but that seem slike way to long, is he paying rent or anything? And its bad that she has to sleep on the couch. In my opinion anyways.

Not my business though. I like Vicious' idea. Thats what I would do... Big Grin
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#13
Given the complexity of the situation, does anyone else wonder just how close the mom is to the boyfriend???

:eek:

Ooooookay...let's not cross the line thinking about that for too long!

I don't know, man. This does seem f***** up. Granted if I was the boyfriend, I would be like...score! I don't think I would worry about having to ask for permission to propose.
As much as I like Vicious' idea, I'll second geo's idea in that it might be better to move out and possibly help your brother seeing how your mom isn't going to. Smile
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#14
Vicious Wrote:Glad we see eye to eye. So if you ever need help with pissing off your mom or whomever with my plan, I'll be glad to help out. :o

wait, was that an offer to play the role of "girlfriend?" Just kidding.

Yeah, you should move out somewhat soon if you've been living at home with your mom and you are 21. Graduate from college and go see the world! Start by snagging your sister's boyfriend's paycheck on the way out. Plus, you've been saving all that money living at home and going to college you might as well put off loan payments for a while longer....
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